Lesbian Teens
[edited from ACOG Tool Kit for Teen Care, second edition, 2010]
What is sexual orientation?
• Sexuality is a natural part of every human being. Sexual orientation is about the direction of a person’s emotional connec- tions, attractions, and sometimes about whom they have sexual activity with. Attractions to people of the same sex (gay, lesbian, homosexual), to the opposite sex (straight, heterosexual), and to both sexes (bisexual) are all part of human sexuality.
What is a lesbian?
• Lesbians are women who are sexually attracted to other women. For some, the attraction may lead to dating and possibly engaging in sexual activity with another woman. Some women form lifelong relationships with each other, which may include having and raising children and establishing a family.
How common is it for girls to identify as lesbian?
• One in ten girls is sexually attracted to other girls.
• Often, young women are not sure whether they are lesbian or not, but they are aware of their interest and attraction to other women. This can be very confusing in a world that stresses attraction to the opposite sex.
• A young woman may take many years before she feels certain that she is lesbian. She may date young men during this period of uncertainty, and may even have sexual relationships with them.
• Early same-sex attraction does not necessarily mean a person is lesbian or gay.
When does a woman know that she is a lesbian?
• Generally, teens develop an inner sense of their sexual orientation during and after puberty.
• Some lesbian women say they knew they were attracted to women in junior high school. Others say they knew at an earlier time.
What causes someone to be a lesbian?
• No one really knows what causes a particular sexual orientation. Sexual orientation is the result of biologic, hereditary, and environmental factors.
What can you do if you think you are a lesbian?
• Be patient with yourself. It is healthy and normal for teens and young adults to question their sexual orientation.
• It is important for you to know you are not alone. Many teens struggle with questions and feelings about their sexuality.
• You should know that whatever your sexual orientation, you are normal.
• You should take care of your body and, if you are sexually active, practice safe sex.
• You should be aware of your feelings and try to find answers to questions from reliable sources. (see resources page for links.)
What are the major concerns for lesbians?
• Some schools do not teach about sexual orientation because of objections from some religious and political groups.
• Laws still forbid lesbians from marrying each other in some states (but in18 and counting, including NY, gay marriage is legal and recognized!)
• Few states protect lesbians from job discrimination or count hate crimes based on sexual orientation or gender identity. Because of these circumstances, many lesbians initially hide their sexual orientation.
• Although increasing, there are still few lesbians portrayed in popular media and, thus, few lesbian role models for youth.
• These factors can cause distress and isolation during adolescence, and lead to increased rates of substance abuse (alcohol, tobacco, or other drugs), school dropouts, individuals who run away from home, and depression.
• Lesbian and gay teens who do not feel supported by adults in their homes and schools are more likely to experience depression.
How should lesbian teens take care of their bodies?
• You should see your physician regularly for routine examinations, tests, and immunizations.
• You should have your first Pap test at age 21 years.
• You should protect yourself against sexually transmitted diseases (STD) if you have sex with males or females.
• If you are worried that you or your partner has an STD, both of you should see a doctor for treatment. (STDs can be passed between women.)
• Sexually active teens should practice safe sex.
It is important to:
How should lesbian teens take care of their feelings?
• It is sometimes tough to make it through the teen years. Teens begin to think about feeling physically or emotionally attracted to other people, sometimes of the same sex, sometimes of the opposite sex.
• Please feel reassured that every sexual orientation is healthy and normal.
• Young women who begin to realize they are lesbian may be afraid to tell family members, friends, or doctors.
• If you feel troubled about your sexual orientation, gender identity, sexual behavior, or any other aspect of your life, you should consider finding a therapist to help you sort out your feelings. I can recommend one if you would like.
"They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself."
~Andy Warhol
[edited from ACOG Tool Kit for Teen Care, second edition, 2010]
What is sexual orientation?
• Sexuality is a natural part of every human being. Sexual orientation is about the direction of a person’s emotional connec- tions, attractions, and sometimes about whom they have sexual activity with. Attractions to people of the same sex (gay, lesbian, homosexual), to the opposite sex (straight, heterosexual), and to both sexes (bisexual) are all part of human sexuality.
What is a lesbian?
• Lesbians are women who are sexually attracted to other women. For some, the attraction may lead to dating and possibly engaging in sexual activity with another woman. Some women form lifelong relationships with each other, which may include having and raising children and establishing a family.
How common is it for girls to identify as lesbian?
• One in ten girls is sexually attracted to other girls.
• Often, young women are not sure whether they are lesbian or not, but they are aware of their interest and attraction to other women. This can be very confusing in a world that stresses attraction to the opposite sex.
• A young woman may take many years before she feels certain that she is lesbian. She may date young men during this period of uncertainty, and may even have sexual relationships with them.
• Early same-sex attraction does not necessarily mean a person is lesbian or gay.
When does a woman know that she is a lesbian?
• Generally, teens develop an inner sense of their sexual orientation during and after puberty.
• Some lesbian women say they knew they were attracted to women in junior high school. Others say they knew at an earlier time.
What causes someone to be a lesbian?
• No one really knows what causes a particular sexual orientation. Sexual orientation is the result of biologic, hereditary, and environmental factors.
What can you do if you think you are a lesbian?
• Be patient with yourself. It is healthy and normal for teens and young adults to question their sexual orientation.
• It is important for you to know you are not alone. Many teens struggle with questions and feelings about their sexuality.
• You should know that whatever your sexual orientation, you are normal.
• You should take care of your body and, if you are sexually active, practice safe sex.
• You should be aware of your feelings and try to find answers to questions from reliable sources. (see resources page for links.)
What are the major concerns for lesbians?
• Some schools do not teach about sexual orientation because of objections from some religious and political groups.
• Laws still forbid lesbians from marrying each other in some states (but in18 and counting, including NY, gay marriage is legal and recognized!)
• Few states protect lesbians from job discrimination or count hate crimes based on sexual orientation or gender identity. Because of these circumstances, many lesbians initially hide their sexual orientation.
• Although increasing, there are still few lesbians portrayed in popular media and, thus, few lesbian role models for youth.
• These factors can cause distress and isolation during adolescence, and lead to increased rates of substance abuse (alcohol, tobacco, or other drugs), school dropouts, individuals who run away from home, and depression.
• Lesbian and gay teens who do not feel supported by adults in their homes and schools are more likely to experience depression.
How should lesbian teens take care of their bodies?
• You should see your physician regularly for routine examinations, tests, and immunizations.
• You should have your first Pap test at age 21 years.
• You should protect yourself against sexually transmitted diseases (STD) if you have sex with males or females.
• If you are worried that you or your partner has an STD, both of you should see a doctor for treatment. (STDs can be passed between women.)
• Sexually active teens should practice safe sex.
It is important to:
- Talk about safe sex before having sexual contact with a partner.
- Avoid mixing sex with the use of drugs or alcohol.
- Use barriers, such as condoms or dental dams, between all organs, body openings or sex toys during sexual activity.
- Clean sex toys before and after personal use. (Obviously...)
- Use birth control pills, the ring, the implant or an IUD, plus a condom if you sometimes have sex with guys.
- Realize that you can be at risk of STDs even if you only have sexual contact with women.
How should lesbian teens take care of their feelings?
• It is sometimes tough to make it through the teen years. Teens begin to think about feeling physically or emotionally attracted to other people, sometimes of the same sex, sometimes of the opposite sex.
• Please feel reassured that every sexual orientation is healthy and normal.
• Young women who begin to realize they are lesbian may be afraid to tell family members, friends, or doctors.
• If you feel troubled about your sexual orientation, gender identity, sexual behavior, or any other aspect of your life, you should consider finding a therapist to help you sort out your feelings. I can recommend one if you would like.
"They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself."
~Andy Warhol
|
Susan Malley, MD
Pediatric, Adolescent & Adult Gynecology |
Summit Health
3030 Westchester Avenue Purchase, NY 914.848.8800 |
Summit Health
1 Theall Road Rye, NY 914.848.8800 |
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow." MA Radmacher